


Derry Girls - 2m apart

by mmmelmoth



Category: Derry Girls (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Banter, Comedy, Gen, I just miss my friends so I wrote about Irish people hanging out, Nonsense, Platonic Relationships, QUARANTINE-au, Self-Isolation, This is literally just Banter, and, bruh i don't even know
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-14
Updated: 2020-04-14
Packaged: 2021-03-02 04:02:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 757
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23648911
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mmmelmoth/pseuds/mmmelmoth
Summary: Realistic? I think so.
Comments: 3
Kudos: 37





	Derry Girls - 2m apart

“What’s your favourite snack?” Erin’s hair was tickling Orla’s cheek as she leant above her cousin whose eyes were pressed shut.

“It’s water. You know it’s water.” Orla slurred, annoyed.

“Water’s not a snack. It’s just _water_!”

“It damn well is. It’s ice, and soup, and crushed ice…” Orla pulled the pillow around her head and turned her back to Erin.

At the breakfast table, Erin declared: “Orla’s been talking in her sleep again, Ma.”

“Good for her if she is, she’s using all the practise she can get. You’re all coming out of this quarantine with a social deficit, but not my Orla, she isn’t.” Aunt Sarah chimed in, taking a bite of her white toast.

Mary wasn’t even fully listening to the conversation, busy as she was brewing tea and heating up porridge for the baby.

“She said water’s her favourite snack!” Erin went on, bumptiously.

“And so it is!” Orla stood up from her chair, almost knocking it over, “I was well awake when you asked me. I wasn’t sleep-talking. I was _trying_ to sleep, and you wouldn’t let me.”

Alerted from the screeching of the chair against the ground, Mary turned: “For God’s sake, girls.”

And as soon as she’d said it, Erin was defending herself: “I was trying to do research on sleep-talking. I didn’t know. I can’t help being bored out o’ my mind!”

“I was just trying to sleep, Aunt Mary. Erin was the one snack-talking.” Guilelessly, Orla sat back down and continued her breakfast. Sarah gave her a trusting glance.

“Sleep-talking, snack-talking, can’t one have a regular, quiet morning up here?” Mary’s voice was shaking already, then she spotted her father coming into the living room, “There you are, Da. Can you take Anna off my hands, please? I’m losing it here. I haven’t even eaten yet.”

“Aye, can’t survive a morning without some sustenance.” Sarah indulged in her toast even more, oblivious to her sister’s tenseness.

Grouchily, Joe took the baby and mumbled under his breath: “The morning can’t be regular and quiet. Those are mutually exclusive. Aren’t they, little Anna?”

“That’s right, Da.” Sarah said, upbeat. She sipped her coffee without a worry on her mind.

“All because of that lazy fool, Gary. Where’s he off to, hiding from all the housework?”

Mary’s spoon clattered into the pot of porridge. “Gary’s job is system-relevant, now. He’s been taking all those brave nurses and doctors to their workplaces and back home, and they’re all heroes now. He’s earned some rest. He was up all night, driving.”

“So he was.” Joe raised an eyebrow and sat down at the table, just as Erin was getting up.

“Ma, I’m sorry, I just can’t take it anymore. I’m not made for quarantine.”

“Ah, you’ll pull through.” Mary paid her no mind.

“Talking to no one but Orla for a week, it’s made me see how sane everyone else must be. I’m losing it. She’s rubbing off on me already. If you keep me here another week, I’ll be snacking crushed ice in my free time as well, and think of what that’ll do to my reputation!”

“Aye, you’ll be ruined. You couldn’t handle it.” Orla agreed.

Erin continued to plead: “Let me call Michelle. I _need_ to speak to someone with normal eating habits.”

Mary put down the porridge on the table and proceeded to fill a little bowl for the baby, who was grabbing Grandpa Joe’s face affectionately. “Fine. Call her. But don't hog the phone. And don't scream all that much.”

“Thank you, thank you, thank you, Mammy.” Erin leapt up and ran to get the telephone, and Orla only shrugged.

“I was getting tired of her, too. My crochet-shop has really been taking off, and she’s growing jealous of my fame. It’s gruelling to deal with.”

“You’re so brave.” Sarah patted her daughter’s head, and Erin squealed from the other room: “Let’s go, let’s go! We’re meeting in ten minutes.”

“I must go.” Orla declared, nodding, “Mammy, Auntie Mary, Grandpa, Anna. So long.”

"You'll never guess what Orla thinks is the best snack." Erin could be heard saying from the other room, followed by gasping: "How does EVERYONE but me know this already?!" Shortly afterwards, another scream: "Claire did WHAT to her hair???"

“Personally, I’m thriving.” Sarah disclosed, staring pensively into her cup of coffee. Strands of hair had unravelled from her two-day-old bun, Orla’s onesie she was wearing was a little short around her unshaved calves and lower arms.

“Well, you’re the only one, love.” Mary replied.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Stay tuned for more short, plotless chapters! I'm always happy to read your comments :)  
> In the mean time, stay healthy and avoid people like it's 2012 and you're sad about mcr.


End file.
